Question: during exams do students tend to have a less healthy attachment to their family, friends and school ?

Kirsty Miller answered on 11 Jun 2017:

Hi Fenella! 🙂

That’s a good question, and one that’s probably particularly important for you all just now!

In many cases, you would be right…. Exams understandably cause a fair bit of stress and anxiety (which can lead to you feeling upset, withdrawn, angry, irritable etc.) and this can have a knock-on effect on your relationships and how you behave towards other people. For example, you might end up taking it out on those who care about you, causing them to behave negatively towards you in turn, perhaps leading to arguments or misunderstandings.

However, if you feel that your groups (whether it be family, friends, teachers etc) are understanding and supportive of how you’re feeling, especially if they seem to understand how much stress you’re under and how difficult exam time is, this can actually help your relationship with them. For example, perhaps you can think of a time yourself when you’ve been upset and a friend or family member or teacher has comforted you? Generally if this has happened, your relationship with them will have improved because you will felt understood, cared for and supported.

So to answer your question in quite a long way 😉 , the effect that exams have on your relationships will depend very much on how others treat you! If they get frustrated with you being ‘not quite yourself’ then this is likely to cause problems, however, if they are understanding, and try to support you, then it is actually possible that your relationships could improve!

Hope this answers your question, but feel free to ask me any more!

Kirsty 🙂